so, I was just scrolling back my old posts and finding so much things to be laughed for. lol, the Riya Ela is about to come out. it's just so awkward to read again those sassy yet touching personal matters live on your personal virtual diary, it's justttt... I just couldn't really believe that I've got to eventually pass through all those dark times :'')
but well then yeah, here comes again those times, when I think my past life is actually easier (but lol, honestly no). it's just, that now, life hits me hard with another kind of life personal matter that somehow build me up for the upcoming times. I mean, I do face some matters right now, it's just that it have not sickens me enough that I still bear with it and still alhamdulillah that I have people that always support me and never let me feel alone again.
do you even realize, that things could be more bearable if you're not facing it alone?
at least you have someone to talk to and willing to lift all the heavy weight together,
and that is just alhamdulillah ~
you know, sometimes when you feel alone, other people out there is sad because you do't even remember that you have them. well even though sometimes I still do too, but what I learned is that, never even forget that you would always have someone to bear everything.
please remind me again for whats I'm trying to point!
it is that, on those past times, all those matters felt so heavy because I lifted it all on my own shoulder, without the thoughts of anyone would help me and lend a hand, then turned out I was wrong even though they may came a little bit late, but I do believe, there's no late, it's just God saying that they were in time. yeah, you think about it.
it is just, right now, another kind of life matters punch me in the face again. waking me up again from a year ago that I'm not again in my comfort zone. (well life is never a matter of comfort zone, I know). at several first months I admit that I felt like dying, but turned out then when I told my family and they all were that open and kind, till out of the blue all the heavy weight were just lifted. and that is just how I realized that I'm blessed, to again not feeling alone and lonely because somehow it sucks. it drags you to dark times and dark places. (and I'm starting exaggerating, lol)
awkward? I know, it's just so awkward that I'm telling you this when my blog's starting to look picture-perfect, but then again, I will say, that pictures are deceiving even though not every time.
but let's say, that I'm sending gratitude and all my prayer to persons out there who think that they don't bear their life matters, to them who are alone and feel lonely, to them who see no light on their life, just believe that you are never alone, there will be God even though you may not realize it yet, there would be me, people who still consider about your sanity. I wish them, you, the best and may God's grace will always lead them back to what their life should be, at ease. Amiiin :'')
let's say, that I've gotten to be a tougher me.
let's say, that I am insya Allah ready to welcoming the upcoming life matters ahead, that I just wish may God never let me be alone on those times again, Amiin.. :'')
honestly written, Ela A.
ps: pics are from my personal documentation I took when I was in Oz
please pardon the rambunctiousness between the post and the pictures.
I just needed the pictures to accompany the writings haha :'')
just take it as Postcards from Oz. ;)
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